So I’m being a bit selfish at the moment. I figured out not too long ago that my dad’s kidneys are beginning to fail. The selfish part…all I can think about is how fucking dumb he is. He brought this onto himself and for that I’m pissed.
How did he bring it on to himself? Well for starters he’s an alcoholic. Then when he effing quit drinking he went to pills. Now, his kidneys aren’t functioning properly AND he’s internally bleeding. He knew all of this and on Thanksgiving he fucking asked me to get him a 6 pack of beer and a red bull. He’s a fucking diabetic!!! Which he brought on due to his obesity.
I know I have some support with this but not much (again I’m being selfish). My husband can only take so much because his grandma is dying from Lou Gherrig’s disease and his dad has had Parkinson disease for two years now and is progressing to his legs.
I wish I had more friends to talk to about this for all I do is cry at night. I guess I am just throwing myself a pitty party and needed to get it out somehow. I just know I am lucky enough to learn from my father’s mistakes. I can’t drink anymore due to most of my pancreas was removed. I just recently quit smoking and still trying to give up my diet soda (that is the hardest).
Ok I think I’m done talking about it for now. Sorry folks I just needed to vent due to it bottling up inside.
So I really wanted to go see the band Mr. Gnome tonight at the Beachland Tavern in Cleveland but I’m so flipping poor! Being unemployed really brings a new perspective in my life as to why and what should I do??? Anyone know what I should do with my life???????????????